Lung health check programme from the NHS

I swear to God, just come through the door.
“Invitation to a FREE lung health check”
That’s how the letter starts.
Appointment will last 20 to 30 minutes.
Now usually I don’t bother with this sort of shit but I’m thinking hey at my age and the amount of tobacco I shove into them I’m a bit interested.got my attention so to speak. Then… due to covid the check will be done over the telephone.
How the fuck are the going to check my lungs over the telephone.
Jesus Christ, we’ve turned into a third world country inside 2 years.
 
I swear to God, just come through the door.
“Invitation to a FREE lung health check”
That’s how the letter starts.
Appointment will last 20 to 30 minutes.
Now usually I don’t bother with this sort of shit but I’m thinking hey at my age and the amount of tobacco I shove into them I’m a bit interested.got my attention so to speak. Then… due to covid the check will be done over the telephone.
How the fuck are the going to check my lungs over the telephone.
Jesus Christ, we’ve turned into a third world country inside 2 years.
It'll be a recording of Mrs Doyle from Father Ted saying "Will you go get yourself a Vaccine? Ah go on. Go on. Go on. etc." and they'll be measuring how long it takes you to hyperventilate & pass out.
 
This is very straightforward. There is a thing called a telephone. Not sure if they have them in Cov? A person calls you and you can speak back to them. It's called a conversation.

I'm not old enough for the lung test, so I had to look up the details.

The phone conversation will be undertaken, to see if you are at particular risk from lung cancer. If you are (probably best to exaggerate a bit), then you'll get a free CT scan, to check the health of your lungs.

What a great service!
 
This is very straightforward. There is a thing called a telephone. Not sure if they have them in Cov? A person calls you and you can speak back to them. It's called a conversation.

I'm not old enough for the lung test, so I had to look up the details.

The phone conversation will be undertaken, to see if you are at particular risk from lung cancer. If you are (probably best to exaggerate a bit), then you'll get a free CT scan, to check the health of your lungs.

What a great service!
I smoke like a fucking chimney, of course I’m at risk. I don’t need a 20 to 30 minute conversation to work that out and neither do they.
Great service my arse. Great waste of my time and theirs!
Ain’t they got kids to jab or something
 
Oh dear Dick! I watched my Mum die of COPD a couple of years ago. Not nice. When I get that call, Im there.
 
Have you heard the ads, "have you got a cough ? it could be the start of cancer". "get checked up asap". righteo you murdering cunts just let me get this hook out of my mouth first !
 
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