• Under the previous management there was a subscription option to remove ads. If you would like to use this option the subscription will be the same as previously, £12 for the year. I've set up a PayPal account solely for these payments bentleyspay@gmail.com Use the friends and family option and include your user name If you don't do PayPal, there is a bank transfer option. Send me a message for the account details. Again, I have opened a bank account solely for this. Thanks Andy (sgt_wilko)

Leicester City are good for my mental health

B

boondocks

Non-Member
No, seriously. Stay with me.

Once upon a time I got seriously wound up by results and performances. Things would get broken; tv remotes, cups, glasses, etc. I would be mardy as fuk for days, a right cnut quite frankly. Tbh, I was embarrassed by my own behaviour. Shamed even. So I decided it had to change. For both myself and those around me. Slowly slowly I was able to get a grip on it. The last x seasons have given me lots of occasions to practice!

I still get stressed during games but I manage it, and I'm learrning to back off. Yesterday was a good test, even though I had to bail and switch it off. Watching us can be like an exposure therapy for me, deliberating walking into the lion's den (not THE Den obvs) and learning to manage my reactions. I'm getting there and feeling the benefits in my life more generally. I'm way more zen than I ever used to be.

If Martin stays in the job, I'll be the dalai f-ing lama come Christmas!
 
boondocks said:
No, seriously. Stay with me.

Once upon a time I got seriously wound up by results and performances. Things would get broken; tv remotes, cups, glasses, etc. I would be mardy as fuk for days, a right cnut quite frankly. Tbh, I was embarrassed by my own behaviour. Shamed even. So I decided it had to change. For both myself and those around me. Slowly slowly I was able to get a grip on it. The last x seasons have given me lots of occasions to practice!

I still get stressed during games but I manage it, and I'm learrning to back off. Yesterday was a good test, even though I had to bail and switch it off. Watching us can be like an exposure therapy for me, deliberating walking into the lion's den (not THE Den obvs) and learning to manage my reactions. I'm getting there and feeling the benefits in my life more generally. I'm way more zen than I ever used to be.

If Martin stays in the job, I'll be the dalai f-ing lama come Christmas!
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Don’t worry mate, you’re still a cunt
 
Thanks for the vote of confidence ;)

But, to be serious, I'm far from it. Knowing who I am, and even liking myself, are part of the new deal.
 
HughJanus said:
I feel a song coming on

Well done mate, being angry all the time can be very tiring and can’t be healthy
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Well, I wasn't angry ALL the time but certainly some of our performances could induce it.

Many men of my age, dare I even suggest of our generation, have a difficulty managing their emotions, particularly anger. One of the bridges I had to cross was the vocabulary. I simply wasn't used to the 'touchy feely' stuff. I was to used to all this 'man up', 'grow a pair' bullshit. It was ingrained and detrimental. I had to jettison it and allow myself a new song (to pick up on your word).

It's an ongoing process, probably never ending, but I'm feeling the benefits. I do not like aggression and anger, I avoid it in others and I don't want it in myself. For now, I'm being kind to myself and cutting myself slack when I need to but ultimately I want to be able to live free of it, smile at provocation etc.
 
I've never understood this "ruined my weekend" thing about your team losing. I'll probably be accused of not being a proper fan by some, but it's just a game of football. We lose, get over it, carry on with your life. Life's too short to get angry about things outside of your control.
 
You're very lucky to be like that. Not everyone can be. I certainly wasn't. Believe me, it's not simply a matter of getting over it, or even deciding to get over it. Patterns of behaviour can be burned in, take years of understanding and work to undo. I didn't like the person I became and I decided to change. That's when the work started. Believe me, if I could have flipped a switch I would have.
 
boondocks said:
You're very lucky to be like that. Not everyone can be. I certainly wasn't. Believe me, it's not simply a matter of getting over it, or even deciding to get over it. Patterns of behaviour can be burned in, take years of understanding and work to undo. I didn't like the person I became and I decided to change. That's when the work started. Believe me, if I could have flipped a switch I would have.
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Fair enough. takes a lot to actually recognise the problem and change. It's not just better for your mental health, all that anger is bad for your blood pressure.
 
boondocks said:
Well, I wasn't angry ALL the time but certainly some of our performances could induce it.

Many men of my age, dare I even suggest of our generation, have a difficulty managing their emotions, particularly anger. One of the bridges I had to cross was the vocabulary. I simply wasn't used to the 'touchy feely' stuff. I was to used to all this 'man up', 'grow a pair' bullshit. It was ingrained and detrimental. I had to jettison it and allow myself a new song (to pick up on your word).

It's an ongoing process, probably never ending, but I'm feeling the benefits. I do not like aggression and anger, I avoid it in others and I don't want it in myself. For now, I'm being kind to myself and cutting myself slack when I need to but ultimately I want to be able to live free of it, smile at provocation etc.
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Sounds like you’re a bit of a wimp! Well done, there are too many angry people around
 
boondocks said:
You're very lucky to be like that. Not everyone can be. I certainly wasn't. Believe me, it's not simply a matter of getting over it, or even deciding to get over it. Patterns of behaviour can be burned in, take years of understanding and work to undo. I didn't like the person I became and I decided to change. That's when the work started. Believe me, if I could have flipped a switch I would have.
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I got fed up of walking down Filbert St saying I’m not fucking coming again, so now I watch Coalville
 
Agree with that sentiment Club. Can never understand anyone when people say it's ruined my weekend. It's a game of football and there are more important things that may ruin your weekend.
 
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